“Do away with the opinion that I am harmed, and the harm is cast away. Do away with being harmed, and the harm disappears.” – Marcus Aurelius
In other words, “turn the other cheek” – “Forgive and forget”.
Now we all know we should never stay where we are abused and mistreated. However, I don’t think that is what Marcus is saying. He is talking about the more subtle and common situations in life. Those snide remarks made by a friend, those thoughtless comments tossed around by a boss, those lacking moments of appreciation from loved ones. They hurt. Those comments are mean and vindictive, they cut … deep. Deeper when you are expecting more or better.
The point being made is that they only cut as deep as we allow them. Our own impression of the situation determines how we react, the other party may have thought it innocent, been frustrated with other things, or meant it in an entirely different way. We need to remember, we only control how we feel – we control our response!
We can choose to move on, we can choose to say something, we can choose to go about our day. Yet, we can also choose to hold onto the pain and let it anger us – but then who is really hurting who?